Post 26: Ostomy or not Ostomy....
Ostomy or not ostomy:
that was the question.... quite a weird title, since I wasn't really given a choice, haha ;)
The ostomy is annoying, that's the K of saying it ;) ... it took me a long time to find the right angle to talk about it in a delicate way...
I've been racking my brain for months to tell you about our meeting but I couldn't find the words...
Out of modesty no doubt, vanity too but I must be transparent because I know that behind my screen.. Some of you are experiencing this “suffering”.
The truth is that this mutilation is moral as well as physical torture and I was lucky enough to only endure it for 4 months...
Well initially I was only supposed to have it for a month, but if you followed my journey, I always had great “journey surprises”! To reread my K’s story , it’s HERE ;)
For those who don't know what this charming accessory is, well it's what we more commonly call a pocket, grafted onto your stomach to evacuate what humans normally evacuate naturally, it's sexy, glam and almost rock => it’s SEXY TOMORROW! It's a nightmare…. To tell you the truth, but once again at my worst there were always surprisingly positive resurgences!
We just had to find the tips adapted to each situation to remedy it…
The day I really understood what it was, well actually it was 5 days after coming out of intensive care, and from my lethargic coltard after my 9 hour “take everything out” operation. At the time I admit that I was a little (a lot) upset, I think that I had always turned a little blind to this option that had been proposed/imposed on me, except that in the face of a fait accompli I had no other choice but to accept & tame her!
So when the adorable Anne Marie (the stoma therapist nurse) came the first time to explain to me how the object worked, I was at the bottom of the abyss...
But very quickly, when it came to returning home with my new girlfriend, that is to say 3 weeks later, I had no other choice but to come to terms with the idea that she was going to having to coexist with my body, and that I would be the ONLY one to take care of it! Indeed, I found it very annoying to wait for someone every day to change the bag, and then you are never better served than by yourself, so I took the lead, at first it was a bit trashy but very quickly you get used to it; perhaps we get used to everything in fact, or at least “the function creates the organ” according to Darwin.
And then it's very personal but out of modesty there was no question of anyone seeing it, or worse, helping me!
Very sincerely, I believe that few of my friends really understood, I tried to explain it as best I could, but some perhaps didn't want to understand (and I understand)!
As it was out of the question to stay locked up for 4 months, we had to find the sartorial solution!
The first step is obviously the preparation at home, the installation / changing of the pocket is quite long, especially when you change the base, but once it is ready / well sealed, it's time for the dressing operation!
To hide the thing I had opted for tights wide at the waist, loose dresses, much more practical for sealing and above all not pressing on them, Anne Marie had offered me a belt to place it on the stomach and we could see what fire!
NO ONE has ever seen anything!!
I skipped jeans for 4 months because they really weren't practical at all, but with loose dresses it's perfect ;)
>> I invite you to reread my post on looks to find out more HERE!
So yes it's restrictive but with an ostomy you can live normally, I went out (little because I was very tired) to cafes, to restaurants, I just had to think carefully about the emergency/replacement equipment in my handbag , but it did it!
And I had my friends over every evening at home without anyone paying attention!
So it really depends on where the stoma was placed, for me it was high at the level of the small intestine, so I had to rethink my diet, avoiding foods that were too fatty, too fibrous, see my post food addiKt HERE ;)
Received ideas (which tortured my mind quite a bit):
Temporary ostomies (like permanent ostomies) have no odor, it can just happen that strange noises escape, but no more than a hungry stomach, so no stress!
Maintain valuable contact with your stoma therapist, if you encounter the slightest technical problem (because it really is a specialty; not everyone is able to know how it works), you must therefore go see her, Anne Marie saved and reassured me more than once from small incidents along the way, and sometimes painful burns, thanks to her I inherited an impressive collection of specialized creams to soothe aches and the risk of leaks ;) yum !
>> normally the stoma does not hurt!!! in my case, it was painful (especially at the end), because it had been in place for 1 month and not 4, so I suffered a few burns because of that, but it's really because I don't shouldn't have kept it for so long
It's really a well-established “discipline”, the stoma therapist really adapts your pocket to your needs, morphology is "almost" Great.... irony and self-deprecation are part of the process!
I strongly advise opting for an opaque pocket in all circumstances BTW it's much more chic haha
In February 2014, 4 months after the installation of the said object, I was "put back in continuity", during my last operation (the 6th yeah), and I can tell you that it was THE absolute deliverance! After that I was stronger than anything ;)
Well I remain a little cautious and evasive, but I am sure that those who know understand me and that is the main thing ;)
>>> race report:
whatever the violence of the treatments, the collateral damage, the sexy accessories that can be added to you, it is always possible to find ways to stay yourself, stay handsome & stay worthy! I know how hard and mutilating it is, but by getting used to everything and accepting we become stronger to fight!
Never give up in the face of this K shit, even if it's hard, but if it's deeply unfair, raising your head is the key, NEVER GIVE UP more than ever!!!
Gentle resilience is key!
Have a nice day everyone